I was fortunate to be able to share the story about Children’s Miracle Music here on the local ABC TV channel. So now it is good to build the buzz about how kids chores can be a fun part of family activities.
I guess I am not surprised now that other folks are amazed that kids housekeeping really can get done automatically - with NO nagging!
Do let me know your questions and thoughts about getting the kids chores done in your family - in the comments section below.
All my best,
Christine
Say the word “chores” and your kids will probably find ways to avoid them — maybe even make up a lot of excuses. But it does not necessarily mean that a kid’s chore should be counted as “work.” Kids can often tend to view this work as boring, tedious and no fun, all of which are IMPOSED on them by parents. Kids’ chores can also mean an ongoing feud between parents and kids.
So what’s the bright side? Kids’ chores need not be boring. Having fun is one essential component to getting kids to do the tasks without telling them to. The real job of a Mom is to be the trainer and the cheer-leader.
But how would busy parents be able to make their children “work” without forcing them to? Once a child truly understands their role in the family – to be an active, responsible participant in their own home and family life, everything becomes easier. So this is what the parents need to impart. The ‘self-government trainer’ is a far more important role to fulfill. This gets the kids housekeeping done – and helps a child to grow up being empowered and an active participant in creating the life they want.
Kids’ chores can only be successfully done if there is motivation, understanding and a sense of working towards goals that they can actually look forward to. Kids’ charts or more specifically kids’ chore charts can be useful for kids housekeeping, but more importantly a Points Chart will provide the guide and the clarity of moving toward the chosen goals.
You have to tell them what the chart is for – earning points based on doing the chores (the ‘acts of kindness’). You can also guide them to set meaningful goals.
Many times mothers feel overwhelmed because their mind is full of a long list of “to do’s”, as they look around their home and feel that THEY have to do it all. This is NOT a mother’s job. A mother should look at herself as a manager of a small group of people – her children, and the building that houses them.
Being a manager means that you are responsible for making schedules, dividing up tasks, making the functions of the group run smoothly. This includes uplifting and praising your small group (your children), finding the motivational keys or tools and helping your group develop positive routines and habits.
One way to be a manager of the cleaning part of a home is to make a list of exactly what needs to be done in a room to maintain it. This is more than simply a chore chart. Write the person who is responsible for caring for that room at the top of the list and the time of day that he or she is expected to take care of it.
As part of your home organization, there should be one 10 minute room cleanup every morning and a different one every evening. Post the list in each room so that expectations are clearly DEFINED and can be easily fulfilled.
So often chore charts just create a list of things to do – so that when they are done they need to be inspected or approved by mom or dad. This inadvertently is a ‘set-up’ where the parent continues in the role of a task-master where she or he “inspects”, “takes away privileges”, has to continue to nag and remind the children to do each of their chores.
I get passionate about this subject – and the need for a different approach. Here is an example of some happy kids engaged in sharing their chores charts. I applaud the creativity that this family demonstrates, but I also have a caution about the approach that this mother uses in this video…
The actual functioning of what the mother has set up here would be a real challenge to continue to enforce. Also, she called the tasks “chores” which in and of itself tells the child that there is something that their mother is making them do. (whilst I do use the term ‘chores’ in this blog, I prefer to use the term ‘task’ with my family.) The only real motivational strategies that are set up for the children to actually DO their “chores” are:
That they will lose a privilege if they don’t do them (negative)
That the mother will probably need to nag if they don’t do them (negative)
So what is a positive alternative? I recommend all parents take on the role of TRAINER so that the children learn how to do the “chores” in such a way that they can be self-governed. This may be a little more work to begin with – but very soon the parents can get on with other more important aspects of their roles. Rewards charts are a whole different way to motivate kids. In the Children’s Miracle Music game children learn how to achieve goals – by earning points that are marked on the rewards chart. There is lot’s more to this – and I’ll be happy to share about that here soon.
The most effective way to get kids chores done is to set them to a specific sequence of timed music tracks. Music instantly motivates our bodies to be filled with the emotion that the music portrays. The music invokes an awareness of the passage of time without having to look at a clock. This is the basis of Children’s Miracle Music - setting perfectly timed music tracks to match the tasks that need to be done.
What is your approach to motivating kids to do their chores? Please leave a comment.
Welcome To A New World – Where Kids Do The Housework
Hi, I'm Christine Mullins, the proud mother of seven children. Over the years I've experienced all the joys, struggles, mistakes and successes that go with that role.
I've dealt with the challenge that every parent faces: how to get your children to do their chores, get themselves ready for the day on time, and get to bed on time in the evening.
After years of trial and error, plus extensive research and testing, Children's Miracle Music was born.
I'm passionate to help parents succeed in bringing up confident, healthy and happy children.
This blog is about my journey -- to share the inside story on children's motivation, home organization, family fun and harmony ...and lots more too. I hope you will join the conversation with comments and questions - here on this blog and on my Website.
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